As is Myles I too am dealing with a similar but
different relationship situation, the infamous long distance relationship. Now
unlike Myles who lives hours apart from his girlfriend I only live about twenty
minutes away from mine. But despite the distance some of the same difficulties
still exist because even if it is small any distance is still a separation. Neither
me or my girlfriend has access to a car and we are both very busy with
academics and athletics which makes the short distance similar to a long
distance simply because of the separation factor. As he said numerous people
try to tell you what you should do and give you relationship advice but you
need to stick to what you believe in. Hearing all the people that tell you it
won't or can't work is disheartening but in a way just makes you want to prove
them wrong. Because so many people talk so badly about long distance
relationships or even college relationships I feel like it turns a lot of
people away from attempting to stick with what they have, as Myles mentioned
how many people end things before summer is over. In my first few weeks at
UHart I was surprised to learn that many of the other freshmen guys were also
dealing with distance relationships. When I got to college and talked about it
with people I heard all kinds of things from, "Just dump her and have
fun" to "If you have something good going keep it that way." I
took the advice of the fifth year senior and athletics captain who mentioned
the second view that I just stated to back up my personal beliefs on what I
should do and tried to tune out the naysayers. I agree with Myles where he says
that both sides must be in total agreement and equal in all aspects of the
relationship in order for it to work out. It is not easy by any means to maintain
a relationship especially when there is a separation and things have to be done
much differently. Visits and any physical contact meetings are much fewer and
far apart than normally would be so the time spent together must really be
valued. The distance and rare opportunity to spend time together really makes
you realize how good things were before and makes you appreciate what you are
missing. Like Myles said phone calls, skype calls, and packages make things
much more personal and less text and internet based to help avoid a
relationship that can get to become too technological and socially distant. Although
you miss the person in your relationship a great deal while away at college
there is plenty going on to keep your mind off it enough. There is plenty of
school work and plenty of activities to do. Sports, clubs, and new people are
all things that can help ease the pain of missing someone but there are always
those times when there is nothing that can stop you from missing them and it is
hard at times when you need them the most but can't see them. Similar to what
Myles stated, I believe the most important things in keeping any relationship,
especially a distance one, are communication, trust, honesty, along with
sacrifice. I also believe that if both sides want things to work out then they
will because it is the sacrifice of having an easy relationship that both sides
must give up in order to stay with one another. Just as Myles states in his
last sentence, " This is from the view of a kid who has never been in a
situation like this until now and is blissfully optimistic no matter how hard
it seems to be." I am in the same exact boat of being new to this and have
the same optimistic outlook on my distance relationship for the future.
No comments:
Post a Comment